Most of them are situational, and not directed at any one person. They’re also not really about revenge so much as they are about being wronged. As in: I’m the one being wronged and no amount of car-horn honking, head shaking, or generalized tweeting of displeasure is enough to assuage the wrong that’s been done to me and the righteous anger I feel.
You know, like how most people feel and react.
Among the short list of things that elicit these moments of quiet indignation, I include:
- Uber, Lyft, etc.
- Anyone who patronizes Uber, Lyft, etc.
- Teach For America
- Drivers who roll through stop signs
- People who read magazines (except magazines I like, which are usually about sports, but not the NFL or NBA)
- The NFL and NBA
- People who use the word “bitch” (with the exception of the few people who still say “bitchin'”)
- People who make more money than me
- Drunk people when I’m sober
- Sober people when I’m drunk
- Anyone self-consciously choosing to be gluten-free
- Bros, dudes, etc.
- Beautiful women when I’m feeling ugly
- Budweiser, Coors, etc.
- Non-religious people who complain about religion
- Religious people who complain about non-religious people
- E!, TLC, etc.
- People who aren’t me
- Passengers seated in First Class
- Those who use Facebook
- Slate, Salon, etc. (esp. things by this awful person)
- Dudes who walk around naked in the locker room
- Late mail delivery
- People who don’t move their bags off of vacant seats for people on the bus and train
- Buses and trains
- Rude people (in general and to service workers in particular)
- People who don’t smile at little children
- Year-end lists
This list isn’t meant to be funny. Not really. It’s true a lot of times. Too many times. I don’t act on it. It passes. I’m annoyed and selfish and feel like everyone’s wrong but me. I know all of this. It’s dumb. But still, there are moments every few days where it just seems like the world is out to get me, or my very basic modicum of a decent approach to living is being ignored. Which it is. Which is fine. Really.
This song is sorta like that. Uplifting. Fun. A moving target. When I saw Bahamas in concert this fall he introduced this song by saying it was one of the first he’d written, and for years it just never worked. Not as a rock song. Not as a Celtic song. And in concert he played it, in his words, as a Bonnie Raitt version. It was great, but not the version below. Nothing’s perfect. And sometimes things just never completely fall in line.